Aliens Built The Pyramids

Delivery for New Pyramid's under construction

Aliens built the pyramids…..My son mentioned this the other day just in passing.   Now when I say son don’t think a cute 4 or 5 year old he is 17, but obviously with a mothers bias still very cute.  He attends school here in Cairo and it really made me question the value we are getting for the fees we pay.

It is a commonly held belief here, within the expatriate community, that there is no way Egyptians built the pyramids, it’s  not possible, never in a million years, I work with Egyptians and they couldn’t organize a …. In a brewery, or words to that effect,  well I beg to differ.

Let me explain. I live in new Cairo, no not Katemeya our budget dosnt stretch to that, but in the 5th district, so basically I live on a building site. I see daily evidence that ONLY Egyptians could have built the pyramids.

There are buildings going up all around me, apartment blocks, shopping malls etc and with the exception of the concrete pump that sneaks out at night it is all done with hard labour and limited tools. I’m not really sure what the contents of the black plastic bag some workers  carry consists of, (the white plastic bag is for lunch) or if it is of tardis proportions, but they manage to wack a house up no bother.

I do know you need a sledge hammer and chisel of significant proportions but this is provided by the guys who sit along the roadside with their tools on display. Personally I think these items only come into play once they have realized something is not where it should be, and they move in as the wrecking crew.  Judging by the number of roadside navvies there are lots of things that are not where they should be.

Don’t be fooled by the younger workers with the laptop bags who you may assume to be architects or that most aspirational of egyptian professionals, an engineer, no these bags are for the richer tradesmen who are concealing their Makita or De Walt drills,(although not necessarily spelt in this format) The grinder owning brigade display their wares in a peacock like fashion on their shoulders.

So getting back to the pyramids, they are basically a large collection or similar sized stones stacked on top of each other, in a pre-jenga like fashion that allows gravity to do the work. Now the Egyptians are the best stackers I have ever seen. You see daily evidence of this on the ring road.
There are Chevrolet ( again not necessarily spelt in this order) pick ups with entire house contents piled in, or massive flat bed trucks with row upon row of cement bags stacked at an angle to counteract the bumps on the road, no cling wrapped pallets here its all done by hand, although sometimes they do stack too high forgetting about the low slung bridges they need to pass under. Planning ahead is not their strong suit.

These vehicles even come with their own forklifts on top. No, not real forklifts there are no pallets, or forklifts for that matter,  but that is the best term to describe the collection of bodies having a nap on top of the cargo, or often smoking a shisha as they travel to their destination and commence unloading.

So….if the contents of half a dozen black plastic bags, combined with  a small army of laborers can knock up a fully functioning (erm give me a bit of leeway here) modern air-conditioned building with all the bells and whistles, then I am in no doubt that ancient Egyptians built the pyramids, they may not have intended them to be this shape but hey they usually get it close enough.

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One thought on “Aliens Built The Pyramids

  1. Dianne Miri says:

    Sorry i beg to differ .I am still, and always will be of the opinion that Egyptians did NOT build the pyramids .NO WAY , NEVER ,NOT POSSIBLE ,

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